#43 Boundaries

Jonah Calinawan, The River Crossing. Cyanotype print with digital drawing

Feel I’ve been giving too much

to you

Too much of my life

my time, my ideas, my heart

Too much of my attention and care

you know they say

dedicate your time to better people

and i’m now getting to the conclusion

that I’ve probably misused mine on you

I had all out

all for you to see

no filters or barriers

altough I recognized some red flags

opened the book too soon

and yet you are slowly walking away

in a disguise of the forced niceness of

“let’s keep this alive by the minimum”

I can’t even say if you’ve hurt me

because you didn’t

I was only a slave of my own expectation basket

my unicorns flew in the air

and felt I could trust you

like

“well here is one person who is still worth it”

imagining all kinds of friendship pacts and movie nights